Mr. Schneller’s Message of Non-Violence in the Wake of the Christchurch Tragedy
Just to make things perfectly clear, I strongly condemn the violence that took place yesterday in Christchurch, New Zealand. And…
Category: politics, patriotism & conservative stuff (page 2)
Ilhan Omar and the Drunken Sailor Song (PC version)
In the wake of Representative Ilhan Omar’s unambiguous revelation to the American people and the world that she probably would…
Ilhan Omar and the Drunken Sailor Song
In the wake of Representative Ilhan Omar’s unambiguous revelation to the American people and the world that she probably…
School Days, School Days, Good Ole Socialist Rule Days
This whole Third Red Scare thing with Ocasio-Cortez and Bernie Sanders out there scaring the wits out of people, having…
Breaking Awesome News: HHS Secretary Alex Azar will be appearing at a drug store in Metairie tomorrow!
We at Vorpal-Pen have just learned through our high-quality, pesticide-free, bursting with juicy goodness grapevine that United States Secretary of…
“But think of the children!”
The idea of thinking of the children is something I’ve been encouraging in my fellow conservatives regarding this whole California…
“He gets paid to abide by and to enforce the law.” — Assistant Attorney General James J. Wells (Wilford Brimley), Absence of Malice, 1981
I’m not trying to sound blasphemous, but whenever Wilford Brimley lays down the law, it’s like a voice coming straight…
“If I were a 1.21 jigowatts man…” — cross-quotation of lines from the musical Fiddler on the Roof (1964) and the movie Back to the Future (1985)
Yes, I know that the word is spelled gigawatts and not jigowatts. Among other things, I happen to be a…
“You look mahvelous!” — Fernando Lamas or Billy Crystal, no one really knows
Time to back track for a moment. Time to talk about the Melania Safari. I wouldn’t call it old news. …
“If you can swim in six feet of water, honey, you can swim in 600.” — my mom
My mom taught me to grow gills when I was three. That was a good thing, and there are a…